Co-Parenting Without Trust

I would say the majority, if not all, co-parenting relationships have some level of distrust. If you were once married to one another, you had vowed "til death due you part," you would, "love, honor, and cherish one another." You planned your union would stay intact forever. Obviously that word was broken because you are now divorced and co-parenting your child(ren) in two separate households. Maybe you never married. Maybe you never lived under the same roof. Maybe you never wanted to be together, yet conceived a child together. Now you're co-parenting with a person you hardly know. Your trust requires the actions of the other person in the relationship. If the other parent has given you reasons not to trust them, then the trust has indeed been broken. Maybe they gave you a reason within their parenting or maybe it was outside the realm of parenting. Either way, distrust will in some regard affect your co-parenting relationship. Handing your child(ren) over to a person whom you do not trust, is emotionally devastating; especially when your trust has been broken due to their parenting choices. Maybe you've went through the family court process and did not get the results you were looking for? That is the outcome for many parents. What do you do when you can not trust the other parent?

My answer to this problem you have found yourself in is simple, but at times hard to do: Trust God. That can be especially hard to do when your child has been negatively affected by the choices of the other parent. If you really think about it, you really do not have any other choice in the matter; unless your going to take your child and live on a different planet. But don't do that! As long as the other parent is alive and willing, your child is going to see them. I personally am a firm believer that every child should know the good, bad, and ugly side of both of their parents. For their mental well being, they need to fully know their parents and form their own opinions. Trusting God has many layers. Let's peel them back and take a look.

First, do not forget God works miracles. Trust in His miracle working power. He parted the Red Sea. He gives sight to the blind, heals the sick, raises the dead. He has been doing this for thousands of years. He has not stopped. He can work a miracle in your situation!

Secondly, trust in the love God has for your child. You are created in God's image (Genesis 1:27). The love you have for your child was placed inside of you by God. He loves you so much that He laid down His life and died for you (Romans 5:8). Just as you would do the same for your child.

Third, trust the good that God has placed inside of you will be inherited by your child. Some parents are not concerned for their child's physical well-being but rather spiritual or psychological. Trust that your child will have the wisdom and discernment to not live out the negative examples that are displayed around them.

Fourth, trust all the negative in your child's life will be worked out for their good. Romans 8:28 tells us "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who have been called according to His purpose." Think about all of life's difficulties you have faced. Some being consequences of your own choices. Some due to choices made by people that directly effected you. Hopefully, these difficulties have given you wisdom to not repeat them but to learn from them instead; as well as, an increased level of compassion for others in similar circumstances.

Proverbs 3:5-- "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your way submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight." We may not know why our situation is what it is but we can be assured that it is going to be okay through God.